The scent of a Romanian woman – Guest Blogging

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The scent of a Romanian woman

(Guest – Blogger : Silvia –

Last year I went to a conference where one of the topics in the agenda was the typical Romanian qualities and features. People were asked to come up with words that best describe both the country and the people living in it. Words like “inventive”, “innocence”, “naivety”, “diversity”, “patience” were mentioned. I said “humor”. And I wanted to add something else but I couldn’t remember the word that best described what I wanted to say. For my surprise, I remembered a few hours later, after leaving the conference. The word was “women”.

“Oh well, it’s better that I didn’t mention this”, I thought to myself. “‘Women’ is not a quality, a state of mind or an adjective. It is a noun.”

Thinking that my own idea was stupid interfered with my pride. That brought me to another standpoint. Why would it be so strange to think that women are a valuable and specific asset for Romania? After all, I am not the only one who thinks like this. Very often it is the first “word” that comes to people’s minds after visiting our country. People remember seeing us in the streets, they remember the “hotties”, the smiles, the good looks and the good times, right ? Many businessmen promote their businesses and interests using beautiful Romanian women. And others visit Romania especially to meet the women. Of course, this is confidential information. These things do not appear in the statistics. They only appear crystal clear in front of my eyes.

And then, a flashback. In 1999, Pope John Paul II said, while kissing our land, that Romania is the Garden of God’s Mother. He left everybody wondering what he wanted to say. Like everybody else, I made my own interpretation of his words. The Mother of God is the ultimate feminine presence in the world. The garden is a collection of beauty. Women appreciate beauty because they are one and the same thing. Beauty awakens a woman’s soul. If the Mother of God put all the beauty in here, there had to be a reason. It was not just for fun or entertainment. What if we, as women, should be the first ones to see it? And what if our souls should be awakened first? What if Romanian women had an important role?

So, why didn’t I say something at the conference ? Oh, I know. Simply because Romanian women don’t want the power, they don’t want to be number one or have the driving seat. It is too complicated. I am the living proof of that. Indeed, I couldn’t even remember the word that defined me!

I was used to always put myself on the second place and take care of others first. That is how I was taught a woman is supposed to be. We are pleased with being a nice feature on expensive billboards if that helps us earn some money and companies become successful. “Hot” is a satisfying compliment if nothing else is available. We like being on the second place if this makes other people happy. And we accept being treated as accessories if that means we are well taken care of. If this attitude maintains peace in the country, why should we break the balance ?

But let’s be naughty! Let’s imagine we are one of the most valuable assets of Romania. What would happen then ?Well, it would be as taking a major step in our professional career. We would dress up, organize a meeting, define a goal and make an action plan with the things we should do and say. But, first of all, we would share a vision, a destination to reach with every smile, gesture, touch and look of ours. This would bring a strong motivation. Important jobs are appealing because people invest them with solemnity. So we would choose a great vision and we would act accordingly.

atelier-teatru-umbre silvia nicoleta morosanu romania

Then, we would change our own mentality. A hard and painful experience. But we already have a full repertoire of painful and sacrificing experiences, so we wouldn’t mind adding one more. Besides, we would even have the right mindset and be ready to deal with a lot of trouble, as it happens each time a woman decides to make a change in her life. Just think of all the long talks before redecorating a house. Then imagine the amount of talks we would have to go through to redecorate the entire country. I don’t even want to think about it! But I know we would discover a great power lying somewhere inside of us and we could manage everything. And it would make us happy. Really happy. We would blossom like a peony and spread perfume all around us. We would become a part of the Garden.

silvia nicoleta morosanu silvisme romaniaHello! Dream over. Conference done. You were rather wise not to say anything about this valuable asset of Romania. Considering the filthiness in our country nowadays, we are better off keeping your mouth shut. At least, it is a peaceful atmosphere. It smells awful though… But this will be fixed soon. Someone will plant some more peonies.

Guest – Blogger : Silvia –

The Romanian version here

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  1. It was a good choice of the author that she abstained from telling in that conference that women would “best describe both the country and the people living in it” (Romania and the Romanians) Women are not necessarily a “specific asset for Romania” because there are women that live in other countries in an equal number. If Romania had been a country with 90% female and 10% male, we could have considered it as a characteristic. Therefore, I believe that the author had been reluctant to state such a fact out of good sense that whispered to her that such a statement would be inadequate. What follows after that in the article is something that can be commented. If a woman states that she puts herself (consciously) on the second place, even when that’s the result of an altruism that was acquired through a mere habit, it would be something that all can appreciate. But we have a problem with the conducts raised by such altruism as they are mentioned in the article. According to the author, women would agree to be “treated as accessories”, but not out of pure altruism, but out of interest. The author asserts that if someone takes care well of a woman (which probably means that he would provide her with meal, accommodation and other necessary goods and services), then she will accept to be treated as an accessory. The author conveys the idea that the Romanian women do not accept to be an accessory (“a feature”) in any place, but only in exclusive places such as “the expensive billboards”. And this just out of interest, as the author puts it: “if that helps us earn some money and the companies’ success”. The main quality of Romanian women would be, according to the author, the physical beauty, depicted through the word “hot” which confines the observer’s perception to the visual dimension of the beauty and to the primitive idea about it. I will ignore the confusion of the author when she says that “Women appreciate beauty because they are one and the same thing.” If they had been the same thing, women would no longer be women and beauty would no longer be beauty. Beauty and ugliness may be found in any woman and in different proportions. They themselves know it best. Women should not be idealized, as men should not be idealized either. Because we are at a short time after the passing of the writer Umberto Eco I recall that he wrote that “the woman is the vessel of the Devil”. (A vehicle only good for most advertising messages!) I wrote this just to be in tune with the author’s references to the Garden of the Mother Mary.

    The author then moves on to the important point of the article and wonders what would happen if a woman (as “one of the most valuable assets of Romania”), takes on “an important job.” In those lines we can see the aspirations of some Romanian women, their hidden desires: to get a “good job” based on the aesthetic competence. In other words, what’s the desire of a “hot” woman? An important job, of course, that she must get from someone who may offer that. (The author has noticed, of course, that we have countless examples of this kind in the world and they keep fresh the hopes of many women that are aware of their own charm.) According to the author of this article, the woman, as “hot” as she is, still imagines that she’s competent to define the “goal”, to make an “action plan” and to share the “vision” in a journey to the “destination” that can surely be reached through “every smile, gesture, touch or look.” I suppose the “touch” that the author is referring to means the touching of the keyboard of the supercomputer that she will be equipped with in that important and “appealing” job. In the opinion of the author, that job is not only important and appealing, but also full of “solemnity” and the “hot” Romanian woman reported in this article appears capable enough to handle anything and even to adopt a dignified posture in a new “painful and sacrificing experience”. The author of the article wants us to believe that our Romanian woman has the “right mindset” and is “ready to deal with a lot of trouble” even though it’s not clear how this woman prepared herself for such an experience. The solid preparation seems to be a natural quality of the Romanian women who are not scared by “trouble” or by “painful and sacrificing experiences”. According to the author, the Romanian woman has a reservoir of unbelievable power which may overcome any obstacle and, in the same time, generate a blooming internal happiness full of scent just like peonies. This fantasy is most probably the result of some despair that I may understand, but I must say that even this view about the Romanian women is one of the causes that lead to self-deprecation. As a result of lack of education, various personal errors and trials of life, the woman will come to believe that she is not worth much and that the failures in her love or family life are just a confirmation of that fact. That is all wrong! This article unjustly conveys the idea that the Romanian woman is a merchandise, an accessory, a person that is willing to make degrading compromises and who has no other “available” qualities than her physical appearance. Through the acceptance of the status of a valuable accessory, which is transferable, sellable, negotiable, usable and depreciable, the Romanian woman is no more the equal of a spiritual being that is respectable through her mere human condition, but just an object that may be respected only for or through its usability. I have nothing else to mention, but to say that the Romanian woman, as object and asset of Romania, seems to be in this article just an exchangeable currency which, having no connection with gold, cannot be even considered a long-sought gold certificate. I hope that not all Romanian women will identify themselves with the Romanian woman described in this article.

  2. Pingback: Parfum de româncă - Guest Blogging - Lively Romania

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